How to Give a Killer Hand Job (Even If You Hate It)

Your partner wants to release some tension, but you don’t have time for sex. You could always whip out the sex toys, but those take preparation and waiting will kill his boner. So, what do you do? Well, there are only two answers: a blowjob or a hand job. Take your pick.

Blowjob VS hand job

A blowjob, which is just another term for oral sex or fellatio, requires lots of lip service and a moderate tolerance for unpleasant tastes and smells. Contrarily, a hand job requires far fewer body parts and a lot less self-control. There’s no gagging, no scraping, and no swallowing involved. In fact, the worst thing about it is a slight muscle cramp in your arm. Thus, hand jobs are a go-to technique for delivering fast, customizable pleasure to a partner or to yourself.

But despite the name this is not an occupation, although it will keep you and your hands occupied for at least a few minutes. A hand job is a form of manual sexual pleasure that takes a miniscule amount of physical fitness. When done on your own, it’s just called masturbation. Hand jobs produce moderately gratifying sensations that ultimately result in an orgasm and ejaculation. However, because it involves so much hands-on power, there’s a lot of strategy and endurance involved.

FUN FACT: Did you know that most partners say they hate giving manual pleasure because it takes so long to reach climax?

Why hand stimulation isn’t the greatest

While nothing can beat the real thing with a partner you crave, quick hand jobs can still serve a purpose. Aside from how long it can take to get your partner off, though, there’s a reason why people don’t rely solely on hand stimulation for sexual gratification. In fact, here are the top three excuses partners give when refusing the sport:

  • Dullness – It doesn’t produce the intense sensations of oral sex or intercourse, especially if there’s no skill involved and/or no sex toys used.
  • Potential Injury – You could hurt yourself or your partner if you’re not careful with your motions or if you neglect to use enough lubrication.
  • Difficulty – Learning how to give a good handy isn’t always easy and every man likes it different, so multiple techniques are often needed to provide an adequate release.

The good news is that all three of those excuses have multiple solutions. So, you can actually give and/or receive satisfying manual pleasure without having to beat off into oblivion or increase the stakes. Here’s what you need to know.

How to give a hand job like a pro

First things first, understand that giving good hand service takes practice. So, have patience with yourself and your partner, especially as you begin to learn each other’s bodies. Next, don’t forget about the importance of lubrication. Remember, the human body doesn’t always make its own but dry rubbing a penis can feel like torture.

Also, don’t forget about pubic hair and its effects on penile sensitivity. If you can get your partner to shave, do it. That way, they’ll feel more of your touches and prevent you snagging their hairs on accident as well. Meanwhile, understand that all crotches as different. So, respect the fact that some people are growers and others are showers. Do not make a big deal about the size or shape of your partner’s flaccid pole.

Case in point: an uncircumcised penis. It has all the same nerve endings as a circumcised penis and even reacts the same to stimulation. However, there may be a few extra steps involved because of the additional foreskin. Do yourselves a favor and keep the area as clean as possible, especially if you plan on having sex later. Contrary to popular belief, even dirty manual stimulation can cause major problems if there’s open skin or bacteria present.

5 ways to make your hand jobs more acceptable

Once you’ve mastered the basics and equipped yourself with something other than saliva or body lotion, you can then start the show. These are the 5 techniques that porn stars and high-performance partners use to satiate their lovers’ sexual appetites by hand:

#1. Learn about Penile Anatomy

Much like reflexology, you can learn how to pinpoint specific parts of the penis to generate an immediate result. For instance, the frenulum (or tip) of the penis is just as sensitive as the female clitoris. At the same time, a man’s balls are always delicate, and their shafts can feel ticklish too. So, teach yourself how and where to touch for a most satisfying experience.

#2. Work on Your Grip

You can actually hurt your partner or prevent them from reaching climax if you don’t grip the penis correctly. There’s too tight and then there’s also not tight enough. This technique takes practice and familiarity with your partner. So, pump up the volume or pump the brakes according to your lover’s reactions. If you’re curious how they feel about your methods, just ask.

#3. Give a Gentle Genital Massage

Sensual massages help both partners get in the mood. They can increase anticipation, heighten senses, and enhance the physical or emotional bone between partners. Genital massages also feel amazing and allow the giver to admire their partner’s form while it receives pleasure. Then, when it’s time to touchdown, ejaculation happens much quicker and feels more intense.

#4. Try Out Some Enhanced Lube

Your choice of personal lubricants can play a significant role in how good your hand jobs feel. That’s because some lubes are fortified with sensation-boosting ingredients. There are tinglers, coolers, warmers, and even flavored varieties to explore. Best of all, the good ones are long-lasting and helpful to the skin, plus they can be used alongside your favorite sex toys if the compositions match.

#5. Bring on the Sex Toys for Men

One bad thing about hand jobs is that they can make your arm muscle ache. When that happens, your technique is sure to suffer the consequences. The poor sap that’s under your palms is then subject to the decline and that’s not fair. So, don’t let your physical fitness get in the way of a good O-face. If all else fails, whip out of the male sex toys and let them finish the job instead.

Tips for picking out sex toys for hand jobs

Already know you’re not in the mood for a workout? You and most other people feel the same way. Hands-on sexual affection between two consenting partners is a good thing no matter how you serve it up, but sex toys can make a big difference in how willing everyone is to participate. So, use these simple tips to guide your hand and boost your abilities:

  • Pay attention to the size because not all sex toys are made the same so some might not fit your partner’s penis.
  • Mind the materials. That way, nobody has to worry about allergic reactions, skin rashes, or product breakdown should you incorporate pleasure products into the mix.
  • Consider the functionality to find something that will actually do what you want it to do, which is get your partner off as smoothly as possible.
  • Look for couples-friendly features. Then, expand your horizons by trying new things together like simultaneous masturbation or long-distance play.
  • Find something that’s affordable. After all, you don’t even know if your partner will like how the device feels once it touches his dick. Don’t commit too soon.
  • Try disposable sex toys. When you can’t figure out what to do but know you need some help, reach for one-time-use products like TENGA Eggs and disposable cock rings.

As unrelated as it sounds, you must always remember the story of the tortoise and the hare. Slow and steady wins the race. In other words, don’t rush it even if you hate it because your partner’s orgasm is at stake. Instead, branch out and try new things like someone who cares.

The takeaway

You can’t give adequate sexual pleasure to a partner if you don’t know what you’re doing. And regardless of how you feel about certain sex acts, it’s your duty to at least try to accommodate your lover’s desires. So, if they request a hand job every now and then, try to oblige with skill and precision. Use proven techniques and state-of-the-art sex toys to get the “job” done right.

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